Thursday, July 30, 2009

A letter to The President (US)

I don't want to bore you to tears with baby stories... Just one thing though. I got all melty and gooey this morning when I chatted to my sister on the phone - she had Griffin on her chest and he was making the sweetest baby noises. Apparently he takes after his aunt and chats. Quite a lot.

I was, however, stuck in traffic this morning and got to thinking of the American president and his pets (as one does). I decided I needed to write a letter:

Dear Barack,

Firstly, I hope you don’t mind me calling you Barack. Please feel free to call me Shiny. I spent a long time pondering how to address you, and decided you must get pretty bored of being called Mr President, or Sir, and probably miss just being called by your name, like before you moved into that big white house you live in now. I apologise if you don’t like it. Feel free to cross out Barack and write your preferred name if it is a problem, I won’t be offended! (I’ve been wondering: do you get bored by all the pomp and circumstance surrounding you, always?)

Let me get to my point, though. This is just a quick note to say thank you. Not for all the great things you’re doing and, of, course, for getting that idiot Bush off the stage (although I am very grateful for all those things too), but for getting a decent dog. He looks sweet, and is so much nicer than the other ‘celebrity’ dogs out there. I mean, really, what is Elizabeth thinking with those silly, short-legged Corgi’s and as for Paris – a dog that fits in your handbag? Good grief. Yours seems solid, so thank you.

That’s all. Hope you have a great day in that big office of yours and that you get delicious biscuits with your tea.

Shiny x

P.S. Just one more thing, while we’re on the subject of Paris (the Hilton one, not the lovely French city)… Could you perhaps have her exiled to, say, an island where there are no cameras or film crews? She really is awfully tiresome and inane. You are the president so, as far as I know, can pretty much order anything. If you’re unsure, I’m happy to do some research into it. If necessary, I’m sure you could even adjust some regulations to be sure of your exile powers. Let me know…

I wonder if his getting a Portuguese Water Dog has increased the popularity of the breed?

1 comment:

Angela said...

Shiny, I just LOVE your letters! If I were Barack, I`d surely answer you.
I once wrote a letter for my grandson Jojo (4) to the Mayor of Hamburg. He did not answer it himself, but let his secretary do it, but it was a nice return letter, I must concede. We should get much more in contact with the people who rule us, even if they don`t rule us (like you, you are South African). Have you written to YOUR president yet? Haha, not such a good idea. "Dear Jacob?" tehee.